SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
