You made me cry and you don't even care
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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