Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
