If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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