I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
There was a lot of him and a little penis
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
