you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize