on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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