I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
