Midget sex pt 2 tonight
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
