But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
