Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
