i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
