Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
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