It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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