im gay
i know
yea but for you.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
