Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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