I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Green mimosas i think yes
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
