these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
