hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
you mean i was at the winter classic?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
