At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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