Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
