dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
