would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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