you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
