Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
