We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
