I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
