if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
