I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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