I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize