I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I am one with the molecules
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
