all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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