Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
