hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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