I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
