Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
