her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
