yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize