Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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