ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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