some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
