I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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