Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize