you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Randomize