I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
