i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
don't judge my taste in strippers
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
