How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
