problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
