she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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