help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
You need a sexual gate keeper
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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