The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Randomize