trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
At least life still wants to fuck me.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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